This week, we will continue our Nervous System First Aid, turning our attention to resourcing. This is an invaluable technique that empowers us to navigate stress, calm our nervous system, and anchor ourselves in moments of distress. While resourcing is often used in trauma therapy and EMDR, its value extends far beyond these settings. It is a powerful, practical tool for anyone facing daily stress or overwhelm. When life feels chaotic or intense, it enables practitioners to return to a state of balance, stability, and present-moment ease.

Rest as a Resource: A Reflection

As a little girl, I often struggled to fall asleep at night. My first companions in those restless moments were, of course, a flashlight and a book. But when they weren’t within reach I turned to another source of comfort: listing, one by one, all of the people I loved and who loved me in return.

I would picture their faces, silently whisper their names in my mind, and feel their presence wrap around me like a soft, warm blanket. It was a long list then and, gratefully, it still is. As I connected in the dim light of those restless nights with all the love present in my life, I felt my body soften and my heart soothed. Soon enough, sleep would find me.

As a mother, I’ve passed this practice on to my own children, starting when they were still cocooned within me. I’ve watched it work its magic time and time again, welcoming them into a state of comfort and connection like an old friend. Lately, I’ve returned more frequently to this practice, myself. I’ll be honest... there are days when ease is elusive. It’s in those times, though - when rest feels like the furthest reach - that this practice is the most vital. Along with other resourcing exercises, it reminds me of my ever-present inner calm, safety, and connection. At times they may be veiled, but they are never truly absent.

When life feels heavy, and rest feels distant, the simple acts of remembering our happiness, of reconnecting to our love and support bring us back to our still center. It’s a practice I hold dear, and I hope it helps you to rediscover the vast resources in your life that can soothe and strengthen your own spirit.

How Does Resourcing Work? When stress builds up, our nervous system can become overstimulated, making it difficult to respond with intention rather than through unconscious reactivity. Resourcing helps:

• Create a Sense of Safety: By tapping into memories, sensations, and relationships that feel secure, we can ground ourselves when anxiety or tension starts to rise. We are reminded that, right now, we are OK and that, at any time, we may tap into the many sources of nourishment, safety, and calm both within and without.
• Enhance Emotional Resilience: Regularly engaging with positive or neutral experiences strengthens our ability to withstand future stressors.
• Restore Nervous System Balance: These practices help shift our state from “fight or flight” to “rest, digest, and connect” allowing for a calmer, more collected response to life’s challenges.
• Counteracts Negativity Bias: By focusing on connection, ease, and calm, we help to balance our brain's natural negativity bias, reminding us of the true balance that exists in our lives.

What is Resourcing? Many practices and techniques fall under the umbrella of resourcing. Furthermore, there are many situations where it may be beneficial. 

• Identifying Coping Skills: Develop internal coping tools to cultivate safety and stability.
• Creating Mental Sanctuaries: Recall real experiences, places, or people that evoke peace, or use your imagination to create your own.
• Practicing Self-Soothing: Integrate methods like deep breathing and positive self-talk for moments when you need them most.
• Recognizing Your Supports: Pinpoint present-moment, real-life elements (both internal and external) that nourish you, give you strength, and provide you ease, pleasure, connection, support, and safety. Creating lists, maps, or value scales can help with this.

A One-Minute Practice: Circles of Good Try this simple practice to connect with your resources. You can practice while you’re walking, lying down, sitting, or even gently rocking.

1. Begin with Deep Breaths: Take a few deep, conscious breaths. With the next breath, notice what feels good—perhaps it’s the depth, the warmth, or the release of that breath. Name what nourishes you about this moment.
2. Expand to the Body: Tune in to your body. Is there any part that feels light, relaxed, or even just neutral? Focus on these sensations and the ease they bring.
3. Invite Positive Memories: Let your mind recall what brings joy, comfort, or empowerment. It could be memories of connection, freedom, or simple, tender moments.
4. Connect to External Resources: Visualize loved ones or those who have offered support, whether they’re present or part of your past. Name them silently and let their presence fill you with warmth and strength.

Allow yourself to savor this practice. Let the breath and these resources become a soft place to land, offering solace and strength during moments of stress or overwhelm.

I hope you take the time to play with some resourcing practices this week.

I hope you find deep rest and renewal.

I hope you feel profoundly connected and safe, both within and without.

And, as always, I wish you peace, wellness, and community.

With Love,
Nichole

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